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Don't Ask Me for Advice!!

May 20th, 2008 at 07:41 pm

I have a dear friend who stresses me out.

She's in a lot of debt but isn't actively trying to pay it off. She works 2 jobs, one that I KNOW pays decently and another that is more of a part-time gig. But she never seems to have money to cover any of her payments. She has the mentality that if she can't pay what her creditors are asking she won't pay at all.

Tonight she tells me that one creditor has gone into her bank account 2x and caused her account to go negative. So instead of calling the bank and asking what her options are, she's on the phone re-counting the situation and complaining. Finally I call and explain HER situation to the rep and get some possible solutons for her.

I'm tired. I've recommended NUMEROUS options to her to help her get on track. But I think I'm done. I dont even know how to tell her to stop talking to me about her money problems.

3 Responses to “Don't Ask Me for Advice!!”

  1. dmontngrey Says:

    Ugh, this is a tough one. My mom has the mentality that if you ignore the creditors, they'll go away - RIGHT?? Since she's my mother, it wasn't too difficult for me to step in and control her finances. I hate that she can't be independent and do this herself, but she was driving herself further into a hole.

    You've probably done all you can do. You friend may not want help if she's not listening at all. It sucks, but it happens. My mom makes me want to pull out my hair nearly every day!!

  2. Broken Arrow Says:

    Uh, yeah, I don't normally do that anymore.

    The first and most important step is super easy....

    Well, to share, but not for them to do, and that is to simply TO SOMETHING. Big Grin Make an effort and commit to it.

    But if they don't or won't, then all the super duper tips and advice in the world won't change anything.

  3. Petunia Says:

    You might have to say something like, I value our friendship but I'm not willing to be involved with your money problems any more. It doesn't sound like she's willing to change her behavior at this point, and I would guess that the more you're willing to step in and do things for her the less likely she is to do them for herself. It's a toughie with no easy options.

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